April 29, 2012

Life is not over. A Rant.

So it's been awhile since I've gone on an old fashioned rant so why not.... 

A few things have happened lately that have nothing to do with me and yet have frustrated me to distraction.  And I couldn't understand why situations that I have no stake in whatsoever would make me so angry.  By all accounts it made no sense.  But the more I thought about it the more I realized it had nothing to do with the situations themselves.   And what I'm angry about makes perfect sense:

I am so, so, SO sick of the thought that when you have kids?  LIFE IS OVER.

Um no.  NO.  No it's not. Yet this seems to be the prevailing attitude lately.  There are whole websites devoted to Before Kids Bucket Lists.  And even a whole advertising campaign devoted to this concept.  And it pisses me off.

Because there is an inherent insult in this way of thinking.  You know what?  I have two kids.  And my life is FAR from over thankyouverymuch.

She broke her glass talking about church. @knitwitgirly
Pictured:  Last Friday night.  I went out with the intention of having one drink.  Maybe two.  Then we made friends with the bartender, tried a new shot on the house, and hung out with the band.  A night that would have made even my kidless 27 year old self proud.
I'm not saying things aren't different.  I would never say that.  I joke all the time about how different things are.  Hell my little About Me on my sidebar is basically a paragraph about how things have changed.  But different is NOT the death of funtimes.

No caption necessary.
Pictured:  No fun at all, obviously.
The opposite of that, actually.  Because with kids - especially kids my kids' age - anything and everything can be a recipe for ridiculous funtimes.  Situations that suck as an adult become awesome adventures with a kid.  Even a random lazy Sunday lunch in our pj's can result in laughing so hard that you cry:

Video of our entire family cry-laughing at lunch today.  Over basically nothing.  Yet I laughed so hard my sides hurt afterwards.

And yes.  It's hard.  I'm frazzled.  I'm sleep deprived (I did the math once and realized that in the whole of 2011 I never had more than 2 nights in a row of 6+ hours of uninterrupted sleep.  So "sleep deprived" seems like a poor description of just how fucking tired I am.)  And alot of the times I'm also sticky.

But I am happy.

Deeply happy.  Soulfully happy.  The type of happy that only comes when you know that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.  When you are no longer living towards some dream of a hopeful future.  When you are actually in it, giggles and stickiness and all.

Smells good!
But don't get me wrong.  I would also never say that "life began with my children" or "I never knew what love was until I saw her face" or "There's nothing more beautiful than a child's laugh" or any of those awful platitudes on the other side of it.  They make me equally insane.  Because kids are absolutely NOT a requirement for happiness (neither is marriage or travel or any other life choice people are intent on being judgy about) But I will tell you this:

I wouldn't trade my kids for any awesome trip, amazing time with friends, or ridiculous night out in the entire world.

(and I know from awesome trips, amazing times with friends, and ridiculous nights out)

In other less rant-y news we finally have a grown up patio set a mere 6 years after we built our patio!

6 years after we built our patio we finally have a real grown up patio set!

 My kid in typical her fashion immediately asked "Are we having a party?"  I explained that no, this was going to be a permanent fixture in our backyard.  Her reaction?  "We should have a party"

Yes.  Yes we should.

Edited to add a line of clarification.  I do NOT believe that kids are the only road to happiness any more than I believe that they are the death of it.  Just wanted to make that clear.
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